Archive for category: Get To Know!

After Monday nights Panorama: Life in Immigration Town was aired I felt the need to write this. Considering I’m a 42 year old, Black woman of immigrant parents who was born in Slough, raised in Chalvey and whose brother stood for UKIP for the same place, I can add my thoughts to the mix!

Firstly my own personal opinion on immigration is this; It’s a great thing and I love it. It’s nice to know you don’t have to stay in your one place of birth and can soak up new experiences elsewhere, or seek refuge should your sanctuary be destroyed through no fault of your own.

I’d like to think that should things go wrong (Brexodus) and I’m forced to flee my home I’d be welcomed with a sense of understanding and sympathy for my plight and a little, (or a lot) of love and humanity from others…a girl can dream can’t she?

Fortunately I’m awake enough to know that should that situation ever arise not all will be welcoming me with open arms…Hell, not all are welcoming me with open arms here in my hometown let alone elsewhere, but that’s a part of life. Some folk ain’t ever gon’ change and are ready to dislike you on looks alone which is their prerogative, but some things can be helped to curb the distaste.

Whether you choose or have to move to another country you should respect that country’s beliefs and traditions, which is more than doable without encroaching on your own beliefs.

If you can’t, then maybe you should find somewhere else to live. If you’re not prepared to work or contribute to that country in some way and only want to bleed their resources drier than they already are, then you should do one too.

That couldn’t be said of many immigrants when I was younger as they were, and the majority now still are, some of the hardest working people out there, but let’s not get it twisted, there are A LOT blatantly taking the piss and they need to be addressed.

Those who come over and abide by the rules and work to earn their keep have a right to live a life too. You can’t expect them to not use any resources. Naturally they’ll need to be housed, they’ll get ill and their children will need to be educated but somebody’s not doing the mathematics, and you don’t have to be Katherine Johnson to work it out! So who’s to blame? For me there is only one collective responsible and that’s the government. Side eye matey all you want but don’t hate the player hate the game!

When I was growing up the most predominant ethnic minority in Slough were Asians followed by West Indians. I’m of an age where I remember when White people use to run a good few shops in Chalvey and you could get most things from a trip down the road.

By my early teens you could notice the change more, as in not many, if any, White people running shops. It used to remind me a bit of Eastenders – The Foresters Arms being The Queen Vic, the launderette, chippy, I think the only thing missing was the market!, (but we had Ali’s and Jabbles so we were ok!)

You knew your neighbours and there was a sense of community between all races. That’s not to say there was never any racial tension every now and then but that’s to be expected – we live in the real world not a soap! The Foresters was one of four pubs, there was the Premier club (Treetops), working men’s club, the play centre, parks and Koolers bar for the youths – basically there were enough things, whatever age you were, to relieve some tension.

When you remove the stress relievers and add more people you get more tension which in turn breeds more hate. I’m not saying a pint or a game of pool is the answer to all of our problems, but I know it’d help some. I’m actually surprised they’ve left a piece of greenery and haven’t started building houses on the Rec yet!

I live on the cusp of Chalvey now, but I’m there more than 5 days a week as my mum still lives there. I visit the shops on a regular basis so know exactly what that elder had to say about the Romanians and believe me it’s not about being racist, it’s about being a realist.

If it were ANY group of individuals behaving the way they do I’d have something to say about it – they just happen to be immigrants and I’m not gonna feel a way about saying it or offending people. It’s not labelling, it is what it is.

I’m not saying it’s all of them who cause the disruption but there are a lot and I can imagine how some may feel intimidated by them as they literally stand in a pack as you try to walk around or through them. It’s funny though, if you walk a little further down the road, cut through by the recycling plant and across the fields you’ll never see a scene like the one being witnessed on the daily in Chalvey. But then they’ve got a castle and we’ve got a dump.

I have no problem with immigration – I have a problem with the people who control it…or rather don’t, which I’m sure a lot can relate to. I understand peoples frustrations and fears but there are ways to make your point heard and get your views across without it including racism, hate and/or antisocial behaviour. It should go without saying that if you’re an immigrant yourself UKIP is not the party you should be standing behind, in front of or next to.

To have a family member be that guy is not the one to say the least – I really didn’t have a clue until I saw his face on a flyer and was as shocked, surprised and confused as the rest of the majority of the Black community by his actions – but only for a hot minute. I then remembered who it was I was dealing with and soon realised he has all the attributes of what it takes to be a politician so would fit right in.

He actually had the audacity to accuse ME of making him look like a sellout because I chose to put a post up at the time on Facebook addressing the fact that it was not a family affair, as some had thought, and he stood firmly on his own. I would suggest him plastering his face on the flyer and knocking on people’s doors for votes might have made people think him a sellout but I could be wrong.

Slough’s not the greatest place to live but it’s not the worst and it’s my hometown. I can’t say I’ll live here for life, but it’s where I am right now and it’s given me some great memories. It’s not beyond being a great place, it just needs some love and attention. Lastly I’ve gotta ask where Panorama got their statistics from with the average weekly wage being £558!? Where was this poll taken? Which part? Whose wage? After tax? Can I get a job please?

R.I.P to all those who have lost their lives this week.

Home Is Where The Heart Is, Stay Blessed & #CelebrateLife

I’m glad we’re all different and have our own views, beliefs and opinions, (I know I’ve said it before, just wanted to reiterate!). I like sharing mine with you and appreciate others wanting to do the same, especially with the way the world is today, but some people’s opinions leave me baffled as to whether they actually believe their talk or if it’s just the easier option to facing reality.

If you’re unaware all Hell broke loose in Paris over two weeks ago after a Black 22 year old youth worker, known only as Theo, was arrested by four police officers, racially abused, spat at, beaten and “allegedly” sodomised. I’m suppose to use the word “allegedly” because this is the police we’re dealing with so naturally there are many logical explanations as to how a baton can get thrust up your back passage causing you to require surgery whilst four officers are out performing their protective duties.

I won’t even try to throw out a plausible scenario because I can’t, I’ll leave it to the “professionals”, but in my opinion it is what it is – a disgusting, deplorable act of violence and discrimination by racist police. No matter how they try to spin it the math will never add up and you’ll find it impossible to convince me of anything different.

It was one woman’s response to a post regarding the above that prompted me to write about this. She believes in The Law Of Attraction and was adamant everything in life is based on that. Now, I get the basics and even agree with it; we have the ability to attract things in our life that we focus on. If it’s negativity then expect it back and if it’s love, light, peace and prosperity then that’s what you can/should expect in return also.

I understand her thinking but the same rule cannot be applied for everything – it can only go so far for some, which was a point being made to her that she seemed to completely miss, so I’m throwing it out there to see if any other thinkers like her can explain it to me as I really don’t get how it can be condoned. I’ve heard it said by a few people but yet to hear a credible answer. It usually ends in “You don’t get it.”, or “It goes deeper than that!”. I’m giving you the time to enlighten me, I beg you please!

How does The Law Of Attraction apply when the law is attracted to doing you damage? How does it work when you’re throwing out that positive energy but receiving the negative back because of something you can’t change about yourself and shouldn’t have to? What LOA is it that sends rapists, racists, paedophiles and murderers to their victims? How do the victims, especially children, attract that kind of attention? To me it seems like a cop out so I’ll be eagerly awaiting your response to set me straight!

On a lighter note my fiancé and myself took the girls to see Hidden Figures yesterday and we loved every minute of it. A brilliant example of how determination, perseverance and understanding can lead the way forward. Some would say the LOA was in play here too but what was also evident in the film is that it wasn’t until the majority woke up to what the minority could achieve given a fair chance did great things happen!

1961 or 2017 – the same rule applies!

R.I.P to all those who have lost their lives this week.

Shine Your Light, Stay Blessed & #CelebrateLife

Well no one can say that 2016 wasn’t an eventful year! Not all great events to say the least, but eventful nonetheless! I’m not going to go over the highs and lows – if you don’t know, you’ll soon get to know about some of them as a lot of the events have far reaching repercussions that will be felt well into the New Year and beyond.

The past 7 days have been a doozy for deaths, especially of celebrities. It just goes to prove as I said a few weeks ago, that it doesn’t matter who you are or what you have; when your time’s up, your time’s up! Yet despite knowing we only have a limited time here that could be cut short at any moment, some people still choose to waste time – which is fine and their prerogative – but don’t attempt to waste mine.

They say everything happens for a reason and there’s a blessing in every lesson. The older I’ve become, the more I believe that it’s true. Some life experiences have the knack of waking you up to reality. Some of us acknowledge this and grow and change; some remain the same. For the growers and changers we understand that not everybody will get it and wonder why we’re not playing the game anymore. Why we don’t respond or rise to certain situations. It’s because we know there’s more to life than fuckery and no matter who they are; friend, family or foe, there’s nothing more important than doing you first.

I don’t know how much time I have left on this Earth but I do know I still have 3 and a half years before the cloud over my head is officially lifted. I try not to think about it too much and let the sun shine through, but was recently reminded that too much stress is fuel for cancer and my body is throwing out warning signs. Some of the stress cannot be avoided but others can and I have made the conscious decision to eliminate unnecessary stress causing shit from my life. Signs are everywhere trust me, we just have to be awake enough to see them and heed them.

I’m not expecting 2017 to bring miracles (as much as I may wish it!) but it will undoubtedly bring change. I have been blessed with some amazing people in my life, most importantly the man who has given me the most – my beautiful (though sometimes challenging!) daughters and 100% unconditional love. I honestly can’t wait to wear my official Queen Wifey crown and live our life. It’ll be stressful no doubt, but it’s the type I can handle. This kind of stress ends with better days and beautiful memories – I can work with that!

A humongous thank you to one and all who’ve taken the time out to read my blogs. I know time is precious and I’m grateful for the minutes you give up and your support. I wish you all good health, wealth, blessings and happiness in 2017. It will get bumpy at times but remember the lows are there so we truly can appreciate the highs. Try to find a positive in every day – even if it’s just that you woke up this morning!

To 2016 I say, Bye Felicia! You’ve been tripping on all kinds of levels and I’ve received your lessons but you’ve overstayed your welcome. Thank you very much for your services but could you now, ever so politely, fuck off! #JustSaying

R.I.P to all those who have lost their lives this week and year. I pray you are resting in peace.

2017, BRING IT COME!!!

Happy New Year, Stay Blessed & #CelebrateLife

…..Exhale! There’s been a lot of inhaling through the nose, exhaling through the mouth, counting to ten and woosah’s this week! REAL TALK! You know when you’re trying your damnedest to stay positive and appreciate the good around you but with every turn there’s something or someone testing your patience?….it was that time for a while! Again!

I am by no means perfect and I don’t believe that any human being is 100% perfection. I’m not talking about aesthetics but the person as a whole. We all have our flaws, however many, major or minor, there may be. Some of us are more aware of them and try to work on them, others either don’t see them (which happens a lot!) or just couldn’t give a shit. It’s all part and parcel of being a human being. We were placed on this earth knowing the only thing we have in common, without a doubt, is that we all have a certain amount of time here before we die never to return…well…at least not as the same person. We all breathe the same air and see the same sun, moon and stars. We all bleed the same and we’re supposedly the most intelligent species on the planet…hmmm…about that!

I spoke about the subject of humanity in my previous blog Forgive Them Father, a few months back. Since that time there’s been a few things I can look back upon that make me smile and appreciate how great life can be, and even though I know there are good and bad people I’m still struggling to understand and accept all the bad bits.

I have a higher respect for life since 2014. I think it’s a part of being in the Survivors Club. You don’t take time for granted and know that it doesn’t matter if you’re as rich as Crassus or as poor as a church mouse, as black as night or as white as snow, young or old and any other opposites you can form – there’s no discrimination in death. You understand the reality of it and the beauty of life and it’s partly why the past couple of weeks have had me feeling like Leeloo in The Fifth Element. There’s a line where she says, “Everything you create, you use to destroy.” And Korben says, “Yeah, we call it human nature.” Film or not, how on point they were!

After nearly six years of conflict the people of Aleppo are finally catching a break and being allowed to leave in relative peace. I say relative as some were still subjected to gunfire and who really knows how long the peace will last? I’m just relieved that after witnessing the horrors those poor people went through, especially the children, they have been given a reprieve, and hope and pray the peace is maintained, but knowing how us humans can be, I hate to be a pessimist but I can’t see it; and it blows! Am I the only one that’s fed up with the way the world is run? I almost wish a higher power would come down and fix the mess that they created!

You may think I’m joking but I’m deadly serious! Don’t get it me wrong I’m not saying I’m praying for the end of days, death and damnation scenario. I’d much prefer a time out on the naughty step kinda thing but hey, it’s not my call. But before they  carry out whatever form of punishment they deem fit, I’d like them to press the pause button on everyone and explain that when they put us here it was with more than enough space and more than enough resources for us to get along. The rest wasn’t in their master plan; they thought that given time we’d figure it out.

They didn’t expect us to turn on each other but embrace and admire the differences between us. They didn’t expect a country to spend millions of dollars on jewels on a Christmas tree whilst millions of people are starving, poverty stricken, sick and dying. That wasn’t the whole point of the story despite what baby Jesus was given. They didn’t expect people to be bombed out of their homes, or used and abused, or tortured and destroyed by something as petty as skin colour or who they choose to love. We didn’t understand that we should respect each other and nature and not the materialistic things we hold the most value in.

Nature is the one gift we were all given to share, (granted some things you could have kept to yourself!🕷), and in our death it continues to survive, yet we’re happy to kill off the planet and not utilise natures remedies to its full potential to fatten our pockets whilst our fellow brethren are dying. “Saving” the planet by recycling whilst allowing the manufacturers to continue producing plastic packaging for us to use that destroys the wildlife yet fining us for not recycling correctly – (yep, it all matters!)

Honestly, when the time comes and they spell it out to us we’ll be kicking ourselves! The conclusion will be, ‘We had it easy – we made it hard!’  #RealTalk.

The world is actually big enough for us all to live in peace. I’m not saying we have to like each other, but there’s enough space for us to live together without the need of hurt and bloodshed. Seriously, what have we become? Brother Marvin, we’re still asking what’s going on! Until the day I’m blessed or cursed with the answer I’ll continue to try to be the best human being I can be. I would love to be able to solve all the worlds problems but I’m not quite there yet!

Wherever possible I will always do my bit to help a cause or support a friend, even if it is just with words, but ultimately I have to do me before I can do you. That may mean that you haven’t been at the forefront of my mind but not that I’ve forgotten you completely. I may well have had bigger and more important issues that I have to deal with that are priority, and if it upsets you that I be so bold to tell you so and set you straight (all said with love), quite frankly, that’s your business. We all have our crosses to bear – trust me I GET IT, but the world doesn’t stop because of it.

Respect the fact it’s not all about you sometimes and ask yourself how much attention you’ve paid to the friendship. This week I’ve had a couple of situations that really got to me for a hot minute but then I had to stop and put myself back in check. I’ve fucked off friend and family alike but oh well. If they’re true they’ll sit back and assess where I was coming from and hopefully understand, if not, whatever. You’ll reach a point in your life when you will be comfortable with this decision – no matter what they bring to the table. It’s the point you reach when you know you’re doing or have done right for you and others. Once you’ve experienced it you’ll be more at peace in the long run.

Thankfully that’s the thing about humanity and humankind – for every person that darkens your day there’s another that can shed new love and light. Hold on to those ones. Shade’s only good for so long.

R.I.P to those we’ve lost, and love and blessings to all.

Inhale The Good Shit, Exhale The Bullshit!, Stay Blessed & #CelebrateLife