♥ Originally posted back in January 2017. ♥


So we’re six days into 2017 and Nora’s prediction didn’t quite bear fruit – we’re still here, yay!! It’s a shame that within hours of the new year we were hit with how mad and sad the world can be with the nightclub shootings in Turkey, and so it continues. The world keeps turning and the beat goes on!

There are certain beats that will always be playing in life. I like to imagine it as our personal human playlist that we’re instilled with. There’s every type of beat going that pertains to making you a part of society; social, ethical, compassion, love, hate etc – it’s down to you how you turn on, tune in, drop out and tun’ up! We control the levels and more time we need to start hollering our own tune than remixing someone else’s.

I people watch but I don’t watch people and yes, there is a big difference! I love a bit of people watching – we’re all human (I think!) but boy do we come in a wide range and some folk, from their outside appearance alone, are fascinating creatures.

Obviously you can’t judge a book by its cover, but it does make you wonder sometimes. I don’t spend my whole life doing it but when I get the time to do so (like sitting in a doctors surgery for over an hour!), it’s hard not to take in those around you. That is the difference between the two: people watching is taking things in; watching people is taking things on.

I’ve never been one to watch people. It’s too much like hard work. I’m not interested in keeping up with the Joneses or the Karcrashians thank you all the same. Better yourself and your life for you. Admire and aspire, but when it’s all about impressing or outdoing the neighbours is it really worth all the energy?

There’s no shame in living within your means until you can afford to step up your game. No food in your fridge, in credit up to your eyeballs and can’t sleep at night but you’re rocking the latest designers and top of the range telly so you can keep up appearances. For who? Why does the opinion of others matter to the point of you making yourself miserable on the inside so that they can believe you’re something else on the outside?

People may not understand the way you choose to live your life or look down on you because it’s not how they believe you should live, but if it works for you and you’re not hurting anybody – especially yourself – then what the fuck has it got to do with anyone else?

I’ve had people question me in the past on how my relationship works and it works by focusing and watching us and not others, it’s as simple as that. Life is easier when you keep it real, set your levels and dance to your own beat. More folk should try it!


R.I.P Turkey 39, Jill Saward and all those who have passed away this week.

Don’t Watch – Do You!, Stay Blessed & #CelebrateLife

“Love it would be easy if your colours were like my dreams
Red, gold and green. Red gold and green…”

Karma Chameleon ~ Culture Club

I was going to tell you about a particular tale that happened to me over the past few weeks but that can wait as ultimately it was part of a bigger lesson that I’d prefer to address.

This is a message to those who believe that they can behave in any which way without some form of consequence. I’m here to confirm that good or bad, your actions will come back to face you at some point in the future.

The past fortnight I’ve been shown example after example of how karma works. She has a wide and varying spectrum and can be big and bold or subtle as fuck, but she’s always at work. For some of us it appears she’s on a long ting – I can truly testify!🙋🏿‍♀️🤣 – but she’s here to teach us timing is everything.😮‍💨

You already know how it goes if you’re on the love train, but to those passengers on darker rides enjoy it whilst you can. Life is never all it seems. Despite it appearing a safe and secure journey at some point it stops and the lights turn on, and whatever colour you’re rocking, be it red with rage or the blood of humanity, gold with light or the glint of greed or green with envy or love of the Earth, karma is a chameleon and will adapt to greet you.

Who don’t hear will definitely feel.

R.I.P Leon Christian. Sincerest condolences to your family and R.I.P to all those who have lost their lives this week.

Rest Easy King Tony (Bangy) Cunningham. A fitting send off for the legend you were and remain.🙏🏾

Congratulations to the Bailey and Henry families on the birth of beautiful baby girl Nellie Tara Bailey~Henry.🥰

I’m sure Nanny Tara is watching and guiding with pride as always.😍🖤💚

Happy 31st Anniversary to the Mr and me!💞 As it forever goes, still working through the highs and lows, sure in the knowledge that it’s love that follows.😘

Just to confirm, no I haven’t been away; my ebony glow is the effect of me topping up to the maximum because, a la Game Of Thrones – winter is coming, and with it my usual vitamin D deficiency (🙄😩) so I’m grabbing every ray in the hopes of a slow release system during the ‘Bers!☺️…👀…Ok, I’m pretty certain that’s not how the science works but let me live, cha!🤣

Match Made – Poison Or Peace? Stay Blessed & #CelebrateLife

I can see clearly now the rain is gone

I can see all obstacles in my way

Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind

It’s gonna be a bright (bright)

Bright (bright) sunshiny day…

I Can See Clearly Now ~ Johnny Nash

It’s been 9 years since I was diagnosed with cancer and as I’ve previously discussed I have the lasting effects of chemotherapy in the form of neuropathy to contend with. I’m going to applaud myself here because despite how things look on the outside, the struggle is very much real.

I manage well enough throughout the day, but when it comes to winding down that’s when I really feel it. The varying sensations and temperature control can be a lot, but imagine my surprise when another symptom decided to pop up and say hello!

I discovered it one morning when I got out of bed and nearly fell on my ass. Thankhfully I managed to fall back on the bed. It was as if my feet were still asleep, then there was a rush of sensations as the blood flowed back to them. They were back to their normal form after a minute or so, but it has now become a regular morning occurrence. I then found myself doing a mental tally of my battered and aging body and added it to an ever growing list.😩

I can’t tell you how much I miss the BC* me at times. Adaptations have been made for certain missing elements – but right now, in this moment, I miss the way I used to be albeit knowing there’s not a lot I can do about it.

That’s not to say I don’t love who I am now because I really do – excess baggage all round ‘n’ all! What I lack physically has been more than balanced out by my mental, emotional and spiritual growth. I’m wise enough to know I can have my moments and still stay on track. It’s all a part of the journey and dependent on how long you want to stay in it for. 

For someone who writes the most I really do need to be listening to me more!😂 The other night is a good example. I found myself doing something to keep ‘the’ peace, and it wasn’t until I was actually doing it that I realised my mistake. I shouldn’t have preoccupied the ‘the’ and focused on the peace. Whose peace was I keeping? ‘cause it damn sure wasn’t mine…

My usual Thursday night blog routine was disturbed by feeling absolutely shattered. You know them ones where you can feel it in your bones. The yawns are coming thick and fast bringing watery eyes and more exhaustion? Yep!, c’est moi!…but then a comment was made (but not made) and I found myself not so tired and more upset and frustrated.

I ended up having a word with myself, and once more awoke the next day with clarity and the ability to address it and let it go. There are times when you will do things to keep ‘the’ peace which is perfectly okay within reason, but if it’s at the risk of fucking with your own then always prioritise you. I should have done just that instead of working myself up and wearing myself out over a comment, and it’s fully on me. #BoundaryCheck

This week marked 3 years since the death of Chadwick Boseman, and of all of the celebrity passings I feel his the most; mainly down to it being the same type of cancer, our similar ages and of course ethnicity. To me and I’m sure many others of the Black community, he will be seen as the warrior he depicted and his legacy as an actor will live on as all legends should.

I feel blessed beyond measure to still be here. Regardless of how exhausted I may get and how many different circumstances come my way, I’m still afforded the pleasure to rise and get over it. I may not be able to leave a legacy as big and far reaching as King Chadwick but I will continue to leave my little legacy for future generations in my written word and podcasts.**

I love life and I love writing, and you should do more of what you love. Cancer gave me many lessons but the most predominant one is just when you think shit is at its worst you can still find beauty in the madness, and it can be the tiniest of things that has a profound impact on you. Hold on to those things and feelings – ‘tis a bumpy ride to be sure and all forms of cushioning are welcome.

Not everyone will understand your methods, but mate, if it gets you through do you! What’s good for the goose isn’t necessarily good for the gander so don’t be put off by others thoughts and opinions – when they start paying your bills or carrying your weight they can talk up.

I’ve ventured down many avenues to find where I am now and realise I was just peeling back the layers to expose my true core and nature. Now I see me and if my being human, open and honest helps even one of my future generations (or anyone in the present) to address beginning to heal their trauma in any way, I’m good with that.

R.I.P Mama Thompson and all those who have lost their lives this week.

*BC – Before Cancer. It was a whole other life but the same essence remains. #NuDawnBible

**They’re coming!😅 The tests keep testing and I continue to do the work, and it’s most definitely fodder for another day!

I Can C Clearly Now, Stay Blessed & #CelebrateLife