Sky Is The Limit!

In my last blog I told you about me dealing with the 3 wise monkeys and things never being straightforward for me. Let me elaborate on what I mean with a prime example. For most, switching broadband providers ain’t a thang. For most! I have come to realise I’m really not most people. Grab a beverage – I’m gonna be a while!

I have Sky tv, landline and broadband and have had them for a while, but my broadband has been slow as you like and reception lacking to the point of my daughters having to congregate in my room as that’s the only place you could get a half decent signal. Now as much as I love my daughters, my boudoir is my sanctuary and after months of invasion I’d finally had enough and decided I was going to switch to Virgin fibre – ergo the start of the madness.

I called Virgin and it was all arranged that I would keep my Sky landline number and receive their superfast, top of the range fibre on June 6th. I happily counted down the days, and 3 weeks later the day arrived.

2 engineers came, and 3 1/2 hours later 3 engineers and a supervisor left – and so did my joy, as between them they couldn’t connect me or work out what the issue was despite my neighbours being connected with no problem. Apparently they couldn’t find a connection to my flat and I had to contact the housing association to sort it before I could join them. Great. Fanfuckingtastic.

This now left me in a dilemma. I’d cancelled with Sky but I still had their tv package. Virgin had said they would sort things from their end to get me back to Sky but I didn’t want their broadband back – that was the whole purpose of me wanting to switch!! As I was getting married in August and flying out of the country in July I decided I wouldn’t do anything until we returned.

Once back, I debated my options and called Sky to verify I was still with them for now. They said yes and sweet talked me – yes, sweet talked, as I put my hands up and admit I’m a bit of a telly addict and SkyQ had been calling my name for the longest while, so when they told me about their fantastic SkyQ and Sky superfast fibre offer I got blinded by the lights, and the storage, and the…everything!!

Before I knew it I had an appointment booked for connection of my Sky fibre on October 17th and my SkyQ and mini box on October 29th. That was back in mid September and whilst I waited patiently I became aware that people had been trying to call my landline from mobiles but couldn’t get through. To be honest I hadn’t realised as I could still make calls and don’t get that many calls on that phone.

I called Sky and told them about the problem. They told me they would call me back on my mobile and then I should hang up the landline and they’d do some checks. A few minutes later they told me they’d done their checks and everything was fine…hmm, is it really?

I asked them if they’d tried calling from a mobile – you know, the whole reason as to why I’m calling, and they said, “Well, erm..no.” After trying that he came back and told me it looked like I had a problem, and they’d send an engineer out on October 12th. Here’s where the real fun begins.

An Openreach engineer came out on the 12th and checked the line in my flat and outside at the main box. I got a call from him whilst he was outside to ask if I was sure I was a Sky customer (seriously!) as it didn’t look like I was connected with them and there was nothing more he could do from his end. He left and I called Sky who told me they were waiting on the engineer to send a report before they could confirm what the issue was.

The next day I awoke to no landline at all and no wifi! #FridayTheThirteenthForReal

After trying to call Sky and being cut off I decided to try their messaging service. All I can say is I’m glad that I did because it’s black and white evidence of their incompetence and there’s no chance of anybody saying shit when I put in my complaint. I started with Andy from the VIP service team in Derry. It took him 5 hours after my security check to get back to me and tell me that it looked like my line was wired to the wrong exchange and the engineers have advised that the line needs to be cancelled and re-ordered. Come again!?!? I asked him why and he said it’s not a Sky problem it’s an Openreach problem…can you see where this is going?

After speaking to Linda, Amy, James, Nadine and Andrew from various departments over a few days and getting nowhere fast it occurred to me that this episode could fuck up my superfast fibre order, so I specifically asked if this would be the case. I was assured it would be fine but quelle surprise, the 17th rolled around and it wasn’t. I was told I’d now have to wait until they’d cancelled this current order and they’d re-order it again…#DejaVuAnyone

Fast forward a few days and after conversations with Greg, Julie and Michael I got nowhere but Steve then told me my landline order still hadn’t been cancelled and re-ordered as Openreach were now advising they would be sending someone out again to see if they could solve the problem from their end once more. Now this is slap bang in the middle of half term and would you like to guess whose mobile data got waxed off by a pair of leeches on my personal hotspot resulting in forking out for a bolt on? You don’t even need to ask; an official complaint was made!

Conveniently, Openreach came out AFTER half term and managed to reconnect my landline and wifi but it was still super slow and mobiles still couldn’t get through. They advised me that the mobile issue was definitely a Sky problem and I should contact them…again. By this time we’d reached the 29th, SkyQ day! Yay!! At least I’d be able to take comfort in good telly right? Wrong.

I managed to get hooked up without a hitch but because of my supershit broadband downloading programs took an age. Oh, and to top it off, they forgot my mini box. So now I have one tv on tortoise mode and the other one back to basic freeview channels. Not to worry though, they’d sort me out with a mini box on December 1st! If you’re still with me and can process all of this fuckery you’ll realise that at this point we were still in October. They wanted me to wait over a month to receive an item they’d forgotten…after all of the ongoing nonsense – I DON’T THINK SO!!

I got back on to Sky and after convos with Mags and Jade I got put through to Liz. Liz is who I am currently in talks with. Well, I think I am. She’s lasted the longest so far and after 3 weeks we’ve kinda built up a rapport, asking how each other’s weekends were and the like. I had high hopes for Liz. She fully understood my frustration.

Liz put in another complaint (to which I promptly received a phone call from the complaints department promising to call me back the next day…I’m still waiting) and she made sure they sped up my mini box order to November 15th and FINALLY got my old Sky superfast fibre order cancelled and re-ordered for the 29th, with promises that she would be advising that I’m properly compensated when everything was sorted. She then moved on to trying to sort the phone problem out and that’s when the bubble burst. After having a conversation with Openreach, the engineer and their network team they were saying it was an issue with my number. She then came back with this gem:

“Dawn, thanks for your patience. I have spoken to Openreach and they are advising that there is no issue with your number. I have sent it back to our network team to have a look at. Do you have a list of the mobile numbers that haven’t been able to get through and roughly what time the attempt was made?”

Huh!? I’m sorry, you want me to do what now!? Oh yeah, because obviously it’s feasible that every random mobile that calls my landline has an issue and it’s not your shitty fucking line. Excuse me as I call my friends and family and ask them to check their call lists for those times you tried to call me and couldn’t get through. WTF! You’re having a laugh, surely!? Which is what I told Liz in a roundabout way. I don’t think she appreciated my sarcasm…she’s been a little cool since. The smiley faces are gone and she didn’t ask me how my weekend was. I was suppose to hear back from her yesterday but…

And so the saga continues! I forgot to mention that in the midst of all that drama they sent me a message with great news – I’m a VIP Platinum customer. That means I’ve been with them between 8-15 years and I can tell you it’s closer to 15. So what does that mean Dawn? That for all the money and loyalty you’ve invested in us we’ll prioritise your issues and get you sorted? No. They’ve given me a free film and offers for audience tickets to various shows that are all conveniently fully booked.

I’ve got a few more days until they attempt to hook me up with their superfast fibre. Any takers on how that’ll pan out? I know what you’re thinking. Why haven’t you just locked them off and gone elsewhere? All of the above should explain why! I bloody tried and look where it got me. I figured better the devil you know, forgetting that the devil is a liar.

Believe In Better is Sky’s motto. Believe me I do believe there is better out there, but right now I don’t have the energy to find out. All I wanna do is watch a little bit of tv…ok a lot. Sorry, not sorry. I’m a home bird and Winter is here. I may have been born in November but there is a sun child in my heart, body, soul and skin. It’s hibernation time and I want to enjoy mine. Is that really too much to ask?

That was just one of many dramas that make up my life recently. I won’t even tell you what happened when I got a new car!

R.I.P to all those who have lost their lives this week

First World Problems, Stay Blessed & #CelebrateLife